By Steve Provizer

The Arts Fuse recently published a self-examination by one of its critics. In that spirit, I publish this list, accumulated during a lifetime’s observation, as a caution for the next generation of jazz critics — and readers of same.

• Into his or her efforts what must a jazz musician put: His or her all.
• Can the state of originality be surpassed? Yes, but only by hyper-originality.
• Can note choice, harmony, or sense of time be peccable? No, only impeccable.
• What method of household chore epitomizes a listener’s reaction to a  jazz performance: Being swept up.
• To what effect, as per Jelly Roll Morton, may jazz be susceptible to other musical genres: “Tinge-ing.”
• Can the adjective “neo” be attached to any stylistic jazz descriptor: Yes, with “pseudo” as fallback.
• What dangerous cardiac condition can be induced by certain ballad performances: Heartbreak.
• Of what form of empty bombast can saxophonists sometimes be accused: Bluster.
• In what invaluable  sartorial appurtenance can a drummer likely be found? In the pocket.

With apologies to Myles na gCopaleen

Steve Provizer writes on a range of subjects, most often the arts. He is a musician and blogs about jazz here.